Gym Woes

I may have mentioned before that I'm fortunate enough to have a pretty swank HOA-funded gym.

Mirrors to watch your form, nice set of dumbbells, variety of machines, and enough cardio equipment that I typically never have to wait. And it's all pretty new - construction was completed just about a year ago, so everything's all shiny and nice.

Well, except that it turns out there are some structural issues. When people at the gym would slam and/or drop the heavier dumbbells on the floor of the gym, it would apparently cause the floors of the apartments on the third and fourth floors of the building to shake. Which is, of course, a tremendous pain in the ass for those who live there.

So the HOA posted a casual couple of signs saying "Hey, this is a residential building, don't drop the weights because it disturbs residents." And then they sent out an email saying "Hey, this is a residential building...seriously, don't drop the weights." And then they had a plastic engraved sign professionally made to post OVER the dumbbell rack, saying "Don't drop the fucking weights, dumbass." AND put down a thick rubber mat in front of the rack. AND THEN SENT OUT ANOTHER EMAIL.

And apparently, all of that wasn't enough to keep people from dropping and/or slamming the weights. Because one day this week, they were just gone. We got yet another email from the HOA explaining that, well, people just wouldn't stop dropping the weights, and they had no choice but to remove the dumbbells.

This makes me want to punch someone. For me, having a good gym included in the HOA amenities is one of the real benefits to living where I live. I rely pretty heavily on the dumbbells for all of my lifting, since machines tend to feel awkward to me. And seriously, you can't just stop slamming down your weights? I mean, we're not talking olympic competitions here. We don't even have a bar capable of being slammed (only a smith machine) so at best, you're looking at 50lb dumbbells.

Apparently, lots of people were pissed about the loss of the dumbbells, and they resorted to lots of crazy maneuvers. Like, for example, single-handedly converting the assisted pullup/dip machine into, well, a standard pullup bar.

OK, SERIOUSLY? And you don't even bother to clean up after yourself. Psshh.

Thankfully, they've made somewhat of a compromise. The other night, I went for some short cardio, chest & back (really, I just wanted an excuse to listen to the AMAZING new Green Day live album, appropriately titled "Awesome as F**k"), and happily discovered that we had regained limited dumbbell privileges:

Let's not focus on (i) the still-mostly-empty rack or (ii) the fact that we're only responsible enough to use colorful vinyl-covered dumbbells. It doesn't matter to me, because I generally only use the 15's anyway. The few back exercises I did with dumbbells - mostly variations on the bent-over row - I can comfortably do on one of the machines.

But REALLY. See the mats? See the sign? COME ON, PEOPLE. This isn't a college meatmarket gym. Behave yourselves!